Some one has well said that real etiquette is merely putting the Golden Rule into practice and doing to others as you would be done by. Certainly this is true and is an excellent explanation of kind little rules and regulations, such as answering invitations quickly and clearly when we are to be guests, and welcoming the guest cordially and kindly when we act as host or hostess.
The rules of good breeding in this particular are neither long nor difficult, and as it always adds to one’s enjoyment to be sure that the proper thing was just what one did and said, the important rules are added here that the children may read them over and so be sure of themselves when they are giving or going to a party.
1. Answer invitations clearly and promptly.
It is a good rule to write your answer as much as possible in the style in which the invitation was written. Of course, however, if you receive an invitation in rhyme, you may answer in prose, but let the prose be natural and bright and pleasant as the invitation is. If the invitation is from a little boy or girl who is your friend, you may answer it informally in this Way:
Dear Eleanor,
It was very kind of you to invite me to your birthday party on Thursday the Eighteenth, and I shall be very glad to be with you on that date. Hoping that you may have good weather for your party I am,
Affectionately,
Lucille
2. If on the other hand you cannot accept, it would be nice to mention the reason why you cannot do so.
For of course you would reply to the invitation as soon as possible after receiving it and decline just as prettily as if you accepted. The reason or excuse will be different in every case, but this form will give you an idea how to decline an invitation gracefully and kindly.
My Dear Elizabeth,
It was dear of you to ask me to meet your cousin, and I should love to do so, but unfortunately I have an appointment to go to the matinee with Aunt Kate on the very afternoon of your party. It was made long in advance, and so I will not be able to be with you on that date. Wishing you a lovely time I am,
Sincerely your friend,
Esther Allen
3. If, on the contrary, you are hostess and are issuing invitations for a party, be sure to write them very clearly, telling the date, hour, and place, so that there will be no mistake. A good form which could be used for almost any kind of party would be this:
Dear Herbert,
On Thursday Evening, April 9, I am going to have a crowd of the boys and girls here at my home to celebrate (insert reason for the party). I hope you can be one of us, for we would all love to have you. Send me a line to say if I may expect you, and if possible let your answer be ‘yes.’
Yours affectionately,
Sam
4. Now let us imagine that you, dear reader, have just reached the house where you are to be a welcome guest. Try not to be shy or stiff, for both of these awkward mannerisms are habits and must be forced to the wall.
5. Be cheerful without being too noisy or talking too loudly when you arrive; if there is some one in the hall to point the way to the cloak room, proceed at once to this room and there remove your hat and wrap, laying everything together in a tidy pile, unless the maid takes charge of them for you.
6. Sometimes, at an informal party, the little girl or boy giving the entertainment or the mother is at the door to welcome all who arrive. In such a case you would, of course, look first towards your hostess, shaking hands with her and exchanging a few pleasant words before proceeding up-stairs.
7. If you do not see your hostess before entering the room where the guests are assembled, go up to her at once and shake hands, before greeting other guests.
8. Resolve to have a splendid time. Try also to help others to have a delightful afternoon or evening.
9. If you see any one else who is playing “wallflower” and is neglected, make a point of speaking to this boy or girl and try to draw another merrymaker into the fun.
10. If anything of the nature of a little accident occurs which can be laughed away, make light of it or do not notice it. Do not let an accident stop a game.
11. Don’t let any one draw you into a quarrel. Ill-bred people will sometimes be found at the merriest party, but if their ill humor is ignored, they soon come to themselves.
12. Do not romp, however lively the game is, in such a way that ornaments, carpet, or furniture might come to harm. It is possible always to be full of fun and yet gentle and refined. Roughness in a boy or girl at a party is soon noticed and (even if higher reasons were lacking) it will in time prevent other boys and girls from asking you.
13. Before going, shake hands with your hostess and say good night, and tell her that you have had a very pleasant time.
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